Saturday, September 9, 2017
Accepting His Will
I've learned about Will.
It's been a hard journey, because it's not been a physical trek, but an unseen, private struggle.
At first, I prayed, but not knowing what to to ask, I Directed.
(I directed the All Powerful God, the Father of the Universe. Like He needed counsel from me.)
Months of Directing lead to frustration. (Wasn't He listening?) (Wasn't I worthy?)
This lead to Pleading. And to Begging. (Please, it would be so easy for YOU to do this....I have faith that YOU can do all things, so why not this?)
Neither work well on the Father.
All my directing, pleading and begging lead to self-absorption and to bitterness.
It almost led to anger but I held myself back from actual anger, out of respect -and a little fear.
I took no steps, either physically or spiritually, to remedy the situation.
I mostly relied on thinking prayers.
Now I know better.
Begging, Pleading, Directing- they are all distractions. They keep you from learning how to pray.
How to pray to LEARN the Father's will. For you. About big things or little things.
And then DO something about it. Take a few steps blindly into the dark.
Mainly, I work on Acceptance now. Accepting (and remembering that acceptance) that my Father in Heaven is wonderfully powerful. He has a Glorious Plan of Happiness for ALL his children.
And our mortal minds aren't capable of knowing.
Our ways aren't His ways. Our thoughts aren't His thoughts.
But He shall direct our paths.
And all things shall be for our experience and our growth.
Bless the Father for His love for His children. And His long-suffering and patience.
And for His glorious plan that he knows beginning to end.
I don't have to know it, I have only to trust in Him and seek to do His will.
(That's actually a relief, when you consider it fully. )
I am eternally grateful for His plan and for His will.
We'd all be in trouble if my self-absorbed plan or will were in charge.
I'm still learning what to ask for and how to pray. I'm still learning and submitting my will to my Father's and I'm learning to do it joyfully-as a gift, not as an obligation.
It's the only gift I can ever truly give to Him, as it's the only thing that is truly mine.
****This is was written on the tail-end of a 6 1/2 year struggle to get our 3rd baby. I felt to share it now and I'm not sure why. But I seek to obey the Will of the Father, and so trust that it will reach someone where they are and help them on their way.****